Wednesday 30 November 2011

Wild Bean Cafe Turkey, Bacon, Stuffing & Cranberry Sandwich £2.89

Petrol stations don't instantly summon up visions of a place where edible treats are available in abundance.  I rarely, if ever, eat from them.  In recent years there has been a sudden trend for tagging on cafes in an attempt to make you believe that food there is actually good.  Maybe it's just me but buying a sandwich in the same vicinity as motor oil doesn't really appeal.  I imagine them to be dry and skanky and reserved for those who drive white vans (call me a snob if you like, but I bet it's true!)

Today I am trialling Wild Bean Cafe's festive offering.  To be fair, I don't mind Wild Bean Cafe.  I have tried their steak bakes on a couple of early morning runs and enjoyed them (minus the white van naturally!)

As always the refrigerator in this particular petrol station is in the corner at the back (heaven forbid someone might spot me, right? <wink>)  There is a packed cabinet today.  Many sandwiches, including the one I'm collecting, are on 50% off "reduced to clear" (it's about to go out of date).  I hope this isn't a prophecy of what is to come. 

As soon as I see the sandwich, I literally recoil in horror.  Is that awful of me?  I'm not trying to be judgemental just because I can be and I write a blog review.  I honestly do not like the look of this sandwich.  The cranberry has a very pink unnatural tinge to it and the lettuce (yes, lettuce, which we all know is a cardinal sin in festive sandwiches) is actually of the iceberg variety <shock> and going brown (wrong on so many levels!)  A positive thing I can say though is the packaging is genuinely quite attractive.  In an "on trend" postage paper brown box with maroon label at least it's different from the usual red design I am normally greeted with.

I'm not particularly looking forward to this sandwich.  I open it up gingerly.  I give it a sniff and it has, bizarrely, a distinct whiff of nail polish remover.  I promise I'm not making this up.  It really smells like that to me.  I feel a bit ill.  Visually there is plenty of filling.  I am not sure if this is a good thing.  The bacon looks anaemic.  The frightful pink of the cranberry has seeped into the bread and the iceberg lettuce is really bothering me.  I'm half inclined to not take a bite at all but fairs, fair in the world of festive sandwich reviews and therefore it would be rude not to.  I take a tentative nibble.  Two mouthfuls later and I refuse to eat anymore.  I can't really describe what this sandwich tastes of.  Mostly I think it tastes like the breathing in of strong fumes from industrial cleaning products.  Maybe they washed the lettuce in bleach?  Or the ink from the cardboard has infiltrated the bread somehow?  Who knows?  It just does not taste right at all. 

As the remains of the sandwich plop into my bin I sum up the benefits.  The trial is over.  I didn't pay full price.  I get to eat something for lunch other than a turkey sandwich.  I don't drive a white van... 

Verdict: Appallingly bad.  My advice?  Only eat this sandwich if your life depends on it.

Rating: 2 out of 10

Wednesday 23 November 2011

Waitrose Roast Turkey with Bacon, Stuffing & Cranberry £3.20

I have always considered Waitrose to be a regular shopping haunt for Yummy Mummys married to Hedge Fund Managers or those who own at least one piece of Barbour clothing.  Here I am today in my woolly Barbour hat.  Yes, I dressed for the occasion.  I am excited to be here after a long drought following the credit crunch and subsequent recession.  Gone are the days when I was the care free type who didn't register what the price tag said.  Now I am a responsible adult who has watched far too many episodes of "Spendaholics".  That, and I have a mortgage the size of the national debt of a small Scandinavian country so needs must.

The very essence of Waitrose screams (or should that be gently points out) quality.  From the classic, understated graphics to the spotlessly clean aisles and impeccably dressed staff, it's the sort of place which makes me come over all 1950s house wife, want to crack open my Magimix and get baking bread.

I head for their "Good to Go" section (that's the pre-packed sandwiches and ready made salad refrigerator to you and me).  They have a festive range going on here (including ham hock and brie with apples - swanky!)  The box, thank the good designers of Waitrose, is NOT red but in fact a speckled white with a small cluster of red and green snowflakes in the top right hand corner.  I am suitably impressed.  Even the name has been "Waitrosed" and is simply called British Roast Turkey with Bacon, Stuffing & Cranberry.  Full marks for style.

The sandwich is bursting with filling.  Like a well packed Christmas stocking it is delivering me a visual feast of turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, bacon and...  hang on, what's this?  Spinach!  Spinach!  My heart is heavy with dismay.  Just say "no" to greenery in our seasonal sarnies!  Now I am inspecting this sandwich more closely the stuffing looks a tad on the mushy side. 

The smell is certainly there but it isn't rushing out trying to entice me in.  It's much more subtle with hints of stuffing and bacon.  I take a bite and literally 15 seconds later I am hit with a full on peppery punch.  Hmm, perhaps tone down the seasoning a tad?  Another bite and more bad news.  I am chewing on a mouthful of ghastly gristle.  Yuck.  I remove the offending cartilege and promptly chuck it in the bin.  In reality this could be just very unlucky on Waitrose's part but it should never, ever happen.  So far this sandwich is failing to do all the right things.  I WANT to like this sandwich so much.  It comes from a haven of tranquility.  The box was unpredictable.  I let out a dreamy sigh when I saw their grammatically correct "6 items or fewer" aisle.  Even their signage is well spoken!  Come on Waitrose.  Make me a sandwich to impress!

Sadly today's sandwich is a paradox of Waitrose's otherwise perfect existence.  I am struggling to eat the whole thing.  Taking big breaks to read email and sup on a glass of water.  I decide to save the rest for later.  Dismal but true, it's just not doing it for me.  I'm left wondering if this sandwich was swapped at birth?

Verdict:  Disappointing.  That's all I can say.  I'm lost for words <sad face>

Rating: Five out of ten (but I still love you Waitrose!)

Tuesday 22 November 2011

Costa Coffee Turkey Feast £3.55 to eat in, £3.05 to take away

For someone who doesn't drink coffee I seem to spend a great deal of my time in coffee shops.  Costa Coffee is one of those coffee shops of choice for me.  Mainly because I have discovered that on trying and testing all the hot chocolates ever served up in such establishments, theirs is most definitely the best.  In addition to that, who doesn't like spending extra money to enjoy a nice slouchy sofa and a cup with a logo while using free wifi? (Yes, I am a capitalist through and through.  So sue me!)

So on to the sandwich in question.  Costa Coffee's Turkey Feast (oh how original is that name?  Yawn!)  Neatly lined up in military fashion on their low level open fronted refrigerator I am beginning to be able to instantly hone in on the conspicuous festive red cardboard.  This one is adorned with stars.  I quite like it to be fair. 

Upon opening the sandwich all I can smell is refrigerator.  Not the most pleasant aroma to ever grace my senses.  However, the sandwich looks generously packed with (100% British) turkey and sweet cured bacon.  Although there isn't much evidence of either the sage and onion stuffing or the cranberry sauce the packet is promising me.  It doesn't look bad and the description is certainly getting me excited.  I hope it tastes better than it smells.

A few bites later and I can barely taste a thing.  I may as well be chewing on wallpaper.  This sandwich is dazed and confused.  It is lost in some sort of flavourless vacuum where not even the abundance of turkey and bacon is saving it from baked good oblivion.  I suspect that a mouthful of my finger nails would be more satisfying than this sorry excuse of a sandwich.  The (malted brown) bread is dry and cardboardy.  The whole thing is beginning to irritate me (more so that I can hear the enduring "kerching" of £3.55 ringing in my ears - I stayed for the hot choc and the comfy sofa ya see!).

Finishing this sandwich was a chore.  The last bite leaves me feeling semi triumphant but mostly depressed.  I think I'm going to need another lunch.

I down my hot chocolate and make my exit pondering a more relevant choice of name for this sandwich.  Not "Turkey Feast" but most definitely "Turkey Fleeced"; a warning to all would be purchasers.  I am not Merry Costa'ed at all!  Wrong on so many levels.  Urgh!

Verdict: Not one of Costa's finest moments.  Stick to what you know best i.e. hot drinks and cosy upholstery.

Rating: 4 out of 10 (four points for the box on this occasion!)

Thursday 17 November 2011

Boots Turkey Feast: £2.60

Boots.  It's a chemist.  Not a place synonymous with baked goods.  Here I buy multi vitamins and replacement mascara, and revel in the number of points I can stack up on my loyalty card.  I do not generally buy lunch.  Unless I am caught short and cannot be bothered to walk anywhere else.  Often I forget they have fridges full of sandwiches et al.  Crouching behind the shelves of mild medications the fridges lead a gloomy existence and look as though they are turned off.  Their food offering is all a bit "health mad" and verging on the bland for me.

Having said all of that, last year their festive sandwich really impressed me.  It was so much more than I was predicting from a company who uses a tape measure design on their packaging.  I have high expectations for this year's offering.

So onto the sandwich itself.  Yet another one named "Turkey Feast" and placed in a red cardboard box with a seasonal design.  This is all getting a bit tiring.  Is red the only colour associated with Christmas?  I notice even my blog is red dammit! Has Coca-Cola brain washed the world?  Boots' box has a little robin red breast drawing.  Twee but cute.  At least they tried.

I open up my sandwich and wait for a smell to waft out.  Nothing. Nada. Nil.  I place the sandwich directly under my nose.  No aroma at all.  This is weird.  I keep sniffing and eventually give up.  This sandwich has the fragrance of a black hole.  It looks ok ish.  The bread is very brown.  Like it has just stepped off a charter jet from Magaluf.  The cranberry is scarily pink looking.  Almost halloweenesque (think vampire makeup).  The stuffing is mixed with the mayo (horror of all horrors!) and some sorry looking spinach is sticking out of its backside.  Here's where I have to say that despite containing spinach this is an improvement on lettuce (spinach being closer to a Christmas dinner vegetable) and I can let Boots off the hook a bit for being health conscious as I imagine that's why you are buying one of their sandwiches in the first place.  Still, at least the bacon is a vision of crispiness.  I am hoping this sandwich tastes much better than it looks.

Half a sandwich later and it isn't bad but to be honest it doesn't taste of much at all, which is partly why it isn't bad.  I'm hardly noticing I'm eating anything.  It's the kind of sandwich which is offering me a limp handshake rather than a big flavoursome cuddle.  I'm disappointed.  I read the box again.  Whilst it is admirable that they have removed a whole load of calories, fat content and salt, in doing so they have also pummeled most of the flavour and soul out of this thing.  It's a sad state of affairs the day you have to eat a festive sandwich bordering on a diet version.  Christmas dinner isn't for dieters!  It's for the fully fledged foodies of the world.  Save the diet until New Year's Day or buy yourself a fruit salad instead.  Christmas dinner has rights too you know!

Verdict: Disappointing but edible.  Great for dieters but don't expect it to whack you in the mouth with full on flavour.

Rating: 6.5 out of 10

Wednesday 16 November 2011

Greggs Christmas Dinner Sandwich: £2.60

I love Greggs.  I have a serious penchant for their steak bakes, adore their chicken slices and always seem to be drawn to the cartons of Ribena in their drinks cabinet (something I never buy anywhere else!)  Despite Greggs being a "chain" bakery it's still just that, a bakery.  Not any old bakery, mind you.  After all they seem to dominate every High Street of every town I've been to.  Kudos to them and their success.  Part of which I am sure has to do with their open frontage, which entices you in to the racks of bread and shelves of pastries.  A customer always feels welcome here.  Yep, I'm never self conscious about entering a Greggs!

So today I'm trying their Christmas Dinner sandwich.  A limited edition no less.  Although according to the label if I vote for it on their Facebook page it could be here to stay.  Let's see how it fairs.

Priced at £2.60 it's cheaper than the other sandwiches I have tried so far and comes in a generic see through plastic sandwich container.  It's a bit NHS meets 1970s bakery granted but I suppose that's the point.  Sticking to their bakery roots.  Not over complicating things.  Letting the sandwiches speak for themselves.  Which is exactly what this one needs to do as it is only labelled as Limited Edition.  No idea what the ingredients are or the name of the sandwich (I had to read the shelving tag for that information).  Slightly frustrating if a previous customer has been in rummaging around and moving the sandwiches (it happened to me only the week before last and I gave up trying to identify any Limited Editions and picked up my usual chicken salad).  Anyhoo, happily and thankfully it's clear this is "Christmas Dinner".  It's quite evident as well that it has turkey, bacon, stuffing, cranberry and mayonnaise.  Oh and lovely bread.  All present and correct.  Yippee!  Right, so now to open my sandwich.

Wow!  That stuffing smell is great.  It really does smell like "Christmas Dinner".  Love that!  Bread smells beautiful and freshly baked (some mean feat for a pre-packed sandwich).  There is plenty of filling.  No skimping here, which is impressive for the price.  The sandwich is oozing mayo (this may be a problem as I am not the greatest lover of mayo but that's just me).  I take my first bite, then my second and then my third.  Yummy!  The stuffing is by far the best I have had so far.  It looks home made and it tastes home made.  So perhaps it is home made?  I'll refer to Greggs later for the answer to that one!  The flavours are nice and subtle.  Not over powering at all, which is great.  It just makes you want to go on and on eating it.  My only issue (which is MY issue) is the amount of mayonnaise.  I just don't like huge quantities of mayonnaise.  I've been known to scrape it off my fast food chicken burgers.  My husband on the other hand can't get enough of the stuff so perhaps this is where personal taste takes over?  The flavour of the bacon could be slightly more salty but that's by the by when this sandwich contains the "Stuffing from Heaven". 

Verdict: An amazing value for money festive sandwich filled to the brim with excellent ingredients, stuffing to die for and a name which makes you smile.  I wish it could be Christmas every day!

Rating: 9/10 (it was the mayo which did it, sorry Greggs!)

Friday 11 November 2011

Marks and Spencer Turkey Feast: £3.25 (5p from every sandwich sold donated to Shelter)

There's something about a Marks and Spencer food hall which exudes some sort of magical power. Instantly it makes you feel like you have walked into a haven of quality. For a start, the fact that it's called a "food hall" makes you feel special. Like you are treating yourself. Which, for the most part you are, because let's face it, the prices were designed for the upper middle class hunting set! No matter though, here you really do get what you pay for!

Last year I wasn't lucky enough to make it in time for the festive sandwich. They were sold out. So I ended up reviewing their festive trio of buns (and excellent they were too!) Yes, this is a regular occurence in the M&S lunchtime scrum at any given time of year. More often than not, I have to visit early (forget it if you get there after 1pm) to guarantee that I'm not going to end up with a lonely bottle of water and the last of the fruit salads!

Today I am delighted to see a healthy display of festive sandwiches and ooo, what's this, a Brie version. Oh and over here some sort of smoked salmon teaser. It's all so tempting. However, I must stay focused. After all this is all about the turkey and I waste no time in claiming my prize. I hope I make it out of here before I see the miniature flap jacks!

Back in the real world (i.e. my office desk) I begin my review.

Packaging. Very similar to Sainsbury's this is delivered in a seasonally decorated, red cardboard box. It's possibly a bit disappointing for a M&S sandwich. Yet sandwiches are not sold on packaging alone and as soon as I open this beauty I can feel my mouth salivating from the smell. I can't wait to sink my teeth into it. If it tastes as good as it smells surely it's a winner!

The bread is a beautiful texture (wholegrain). Just the right thickness and it doesn't dominate the sandwich. Each element of the sandwich is visible. A lovely layer of stuffing, turkey, deep red cranberry (hurrah!), bacon strips and mayonnaise.

One bite is like a miniature Christmas dinner heaven! The right combination of salty, sweet and savoury. All the elements combine perfectly. Every part of the sandwich can be tasted but none of it out does the other. It takes me no time at all to polish it off and I'm left wanting more. That's the only problem here. They should offer them on a two for one deal! Strictly not for sharing!

The verdict: In the world of sandwich politics this is clearly a democracy for all ingredients concerned! It most definitely has my vote!

Rating: 10/10 (did you really have to ask?)

Sainsbury's Turkey Feast: £2.70

Last year Sainsbury's failed miserably to impress me. I am sorry to admit that I didn't even finish their sandwich. So let's see if this Christmas they have managed to improve!

Normally I like Sainsbury's but for some reason their lunchtime fridge has never appealed to me. It just doesn't "look" appetising. Which is strange as I buy plenty of food and supplies from them most weeks of the year and rarely, if ever, have any complaints. Anyway, the display itself is a bit haphazard. Sandwiches vying for sitting room shoved in the corner of the top shelf literally falling over each other in desperation to be bought. I gingerly remove one half expecting the stack of boxes to ripple to the floor in a domino effect. Luckily I manage to pull it off.

The sandwich itself. Packaging. Well what can I say. It's a sandwich in a festively decorated cardboard box. No surprises there! Competitively priced at £2.70 I'm happy with that. It already looks a bit flat, and dare I say, squashed though. Maybe it was on the verge of suffocation on the over stuffed shelf?

Opening the sandwich it smells, well, like a turkey sandwich. Not a criticism but it isn't memorable. The bread is a bit thin and the filling looks mushy and wet. The overall taste of the sandwich, whilst edible and not unpleasant, is completely overwhelmed by pepper. Far. Too. Much. Pepper! Yet has only been kissed lightly by a smidgen of cranberry sauce. If it wasn't for the pack telling me this sandwich contained cranberry sauce I would be none the wiser. Minus points there then. The stuffing is very squishy. Almost like someone just made up a batch of ready made finest and shoved it between bread before letting it set. Personally I prefer my stuffing to be robust with body. Or at the very least look like stuffing rather than porridge. The turkey was hard to taste (that pepper again!) so it was difficult to tell whether it was moist or dry or perhaps even there. A very green looking lettuce leaf also graced the innards. While I am not adverse to my five a day, personally if I am eating a festive sandwich I would leave the salad back in the fridge.

The verdict: An edible sandwich overpowered by pepper but an improvement on last year (I ate all of this one so it can't be that bad, right?)

Rating: 6 out of 10